you know friend i dont think you know why i come off like i do
why the colors pop out and im never too rude
why i just want to spread some comfort we all need comfort
this is the style that i work in
always had the feeling that you hesitate
cause you talk with others in a different way
but around me your much more reserved
i can’t quite understand the codes you swerve to
~~~~~~~~~~~~
too pure
you say im so pure
you see me as only what i project
but you don’t know what ive seen what ive felt all the ghosts that i keep
in my head paying rent in dopemine
i seem to be too pure
pushing 25 but i guess i look 19
keep giving me advice that i took to heart twice
i do all this and still play nice
and i still tango with the demon with the crossed out eyes who speaks in the language of all i don’t say
xe cant kill me cause xe needs me
i can think of many who are just that way
~~~~~~~~~
i dont think you fully grasp the weight of me
maybe in sparkling i actually feel free
its everything i never was allowed to do cause it was not inspired by god i never took a cue
cause i wish to love for love’s sake
but i would never ever say gods fake
but the version they gave me never really swayed me
it was just their own narcissistic manifest destiny
this is my house
this is my shield
its not the only thing i am or feel
cause in this house i got many closets
that i hide in when ive just lost it
i’m draped in the CYMK rainbow
and i allow myself to glow
so the next time that you see me
in my fox cape hoodie
and my pj bottoms
know its whats good for me
its my armor cause ive melted inside
the deepest reaches of the thickest evil
i’ve seen what the darkness is made of
its red and pulsing and screaming
forming the shape of a giant bleeding opera house with twisted intensine lining the ceiling with millions of terrified eyes and sounding like the final movement of beethovens 9th
the scariest music of all time in mine
i feel all this and im doing fine
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